For the past couple of months I've been battling a skin problem. I've made several trips to the dermatalogist to try to figure it out. I've been given different creams to try that have made it go away for a little bit but it always comes back. Last week I did allergy testing but it didn't reveal the source of the problem. So, it's back to experimentation.
This time, though, there's a difference. Instead of just a cream, I have some strict orders: no harsh soaps or chemicals and no makeup. Yup, that's right--no makeup. FOR TWO WEEKS!!
Some of you read that and shrugged. No big deal. But others of you probably winced.
I'm definitely in the second camp. I like to believe I wear "just enough" makeup--enough to roughly cover my flaws and call attention to the good parts. My makeup routine takes all of three minutes. When rushed, I will just throw on some eye makeup and lipstick and run out the door. If I'm dressing up, I might spend a whole five minutes on my face.
But I rarely leave the house completely bare.
So the next couple of weeks are going to be an interesting challenge for me. I will be showing the world 100% unfiltered Val. It's no big deal in my day-to-day life--hanging out at home with JT or meeting with teammates. But then I think about the big things--like our big Open House next Sunday--and I start to squirm.
I don't think of myself as a vain person but the fact that I'm so uncomfortable is making me even more uncomfortable. And I'm taking my discomfort as a sign that I need to do a little self-examination. Why am I so concerned with what everyone else will see? Why do I feel the need to cover my flaws and draw attention to the parts I think are good? Why does what's on the outside matter?
I haven't yet answered these questions. If I figure it out, I'll likely share it with you. (Unless it's intensely personal and then I might not.)
In other news, in one month from today we will be in Oklahoma. I am definitely ready for furlough.